Apple is just another word for my life. I live, think and breath Apple. It was not always so. When I grew up, deprived as I was, we only had a PC. Windows XP. With solitaire and mine-sweeper. But one day, I saw a Mac. I didn’t know what it was at first. It looked so different from the other computers I’d seen. It was love at first sight. I didn’t know what to do with it. I wanted one. But back then, I was young. Life moved on. I moved on. It was only later that I would find myself, once again, completely intertwined, entangled, hopelessly in a love with the manufactured extinction of myself – the Apple.


I was on the buss, heading to tennis practice. It was middle school. I was just getting to know what love and lust felt like. And there it was. It reappeared. Someone had an iPod. My gosh! It was beautiful – and easy. What more could a middle school boy want. I played around with my friend’s iPod and I had to have one. Sometime later I got one. It was sleek and thin, and easy. It played me music I wanted to hear. It, with time, even stored pictures and movies! What more could I want? What more could I ask for? As it would happen, there was a lot more Apple had to offer me.


An iMac. I saw one. And after my PC was finally too old and slow to function it was time for a new computer. I knew just which one, an Apple. And so Apple’s dominance in my life began. Before I knew it everyone had Apple products. Now everyone could fit in and be friends. Then Apple introduced the equivalent of a bombshell to the world. A nuclear bomb of sorts. The technology to shake the world. The iPhone. My gosh. It was pretty. Eventually I got one. It slept, as I slept. It woke me up. It told me the weather. It knew everything on the internet – so a lot more than me. How I loved that phone. But, soon it was time for college. And with college, things change.


A new computer. MacBook Pro with a glossy 15 inch screen, state of the art chips, sleek aluminum case, environmentally friendly manufacturing. An iPad? Not yet – but I really wanted one. A new iPhone? Yessir. The iPhone 4. Ingenious device. Have I told you about the Genius Bar? The council of the geniuses? The all-knowledgeable Apple people? They look deep into your deepest desires and can help you pull out your most creative and ingenious work on Logic, iMovie, anything, you name it. If it’s Apple, they know it. This and so much more, is all a part of the Apple phenomenon. And now, all a part of my life. I live. I breath. And I think Apple. And so should you. Life’s never been better. Apple’s my better half.

5 responses »

  1. Jordi says:

    This is a lovely turn of phrase: “the manufactured extinction of myself – the Apple.” But what does it mean? I wanted you to unpack it more. The Apple is the extinction of yourself?

    • ems033 says:

      I liked that phrase too – especially given the hopefully jarring juxtaposition of an “apple” and “manufactured” defining each other in the context of “self.”

      When writing it I had hoped the phrase would spark some interest in the reader, which is why I chose to end the Intro with it – in the hope that in one’s desire to have it unpacked they’d keep it in mind throughout the rest of the piece. I had hoped to use the rest of the piece to unpack the phrase in many ways – though I could have added a few more concrete connections that more directly related back to the “thesis phrase” you mentioned above.

  2. Jordi says:

    Mike Daisey was there with you too. In the full version of his play, “The Agony and the Ecstasy of Steve Jobs,” (see how the title is different from the THis American Lifepodcast title?), he talks about the love affair with the device, about the liberation it can offer. So the journey he tells of learning where it was made is that much more gripping.

    This is a lovely,edgy piece of writing. Your post is steaming with the fumbling grappling of teen-age lust for flesh with desire for coolness. The language of desire- the ipod was “easy”- even echoes the kind of misogyny that is justified as “normal” for boys. It is ok for you to want an “easy” love partner (be it gadget or girl) and it would be “wrong” for a female author to say she wanted an “easy” boy. Intentional on your part? Who knows. But effective.

    After reading it, I almost feel like I need a shower.

    • ems033 says:

      Thanks for your comments, I appreciate the feedback!

      I can see how “easy” in this context may engender some echoes of misogyny, as it is said to be “normal” for boys to want that and maybe not for girls. But might I suggest that the distinct biology of the two genders – as they are quite different biologically – may play a particularly pivotal role in this case. Biologically, guys are “programed” to want “easy,” while girls are biologically “programed” (as well as sociologically trained, I’ll agree) to not be “easy,” – the basis of sexual selection.

      To your more direct question, no, I did not intend to have any misogynistic undertones. Though I found Mr. Daisy’s use of the male, first-person perspective in describing his connection with his apple devices and looked to accomplish a similar feeling to express the narrator’s similar Life-long love with Apple.

      May I point out, too, that as the story progresses, the narrator’s relationship with Apple grows and matures. It begins with his ‘first lust’ in the bus, then matures into a more intimate connection, “It slept, as I slept. It woke me up,” and finally into the mature stages of love, where the emphasis is on integration, connection and knowledge – rather than the sexy appeal of Apple’s awesome devices –

  3. […] looking through the past blogs, I was struck by this one titled, “My Life: Apple,” likely due to my interest in the company and the unique […]

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